Ten Money Questions for Andrew Tobias

Andrew Tobias lives and breathes money. He’s the author of The Only Investment Guide You’ll Ever Need, the well-known manual that puts in plain words how to hold on to money and make more of it. As treasurer of the Democratic National Committee, he’s the DNC’s highest-ranking openly gay official.

These days, he’s one busy guy and yet, he took precious time to talk money with us. Of course, we think that makes him The Best Little Boy in the World. Mosey on over to Queercents to read more or catch other interviews in the Ten Money Questions archive.

Why are hotel rooms so expensive? The search for a $200/night boutique experience.

“Wealth buys leisure, but not wisdom.” – William George Plunkett

So last weekend it was my birthday. Sound the trumpets! Actually, they sounded last year when I turned forty. Since we spent a small fortune on that party and then on Jeanine’s fortieth in March, we decided to scale back and be a bit more low-key with this one.

Jeanine suggested a weekend in Big Sur but I didn’t want to drive that far and take off Friday from work. So we started looking around Southern California at some of our favorite get-a-way spots. Santa Barbara, the Santa Ynez Valley, Ojai, Palm Springs, Palm Desert and a few places in between.

But as we were planning this last minute jaunt all the hotel rooms either had a two night minimum, were in the $400 - $1000 range or sold out. When on god’s green earth did all the hotel rooms become so expensive? Pre-9/11, I remember many a weekend for less than $200 a night in places all over Southern Cal. Those days are gone. Where did they go? And what could possibly be worth spending $500 per night plus tax and fees? Oh yeah, and don’t forget the tips.

Here is where we looked:

• Biltmore Four Seasons: Standard Rates are $875 per night
• San Ysidro Ranch: Daily Rates are $650-$995
• Ojai Valley Inn & Spa: Standard Rates: $450 - $600 per night
• Viceroy Palm Springs: Best Available Rate: $359 per night

Our favorite hideaway in Palm Springs is a place called the Korakia and here rooms still run between $179 and $299. Good luck ever finding availability. We didn’t last weekend. What we did find was a 1940’s era boutique hotel called the Mojave Resort. We stayed there five years ago when it was still hip and new. Last weekend, we found the property a bit tired but it hit the budget spot at only $199.

Jeanine called on Friday afternoon and since they had availability, we were able to drive out for the one night. So we checked in early on Saturday and spent the afternoon relaxing by the pool. It’s just what we needed and wanted but had it been twice the expense, I would have elected to stay home in Newport Beach… even during this gray period of June Gloom.

The crazy rates are not just in Southern California. I’m trying to find a place right now in Tucson for a girl’s spa weekend with friends and no such luck for under $400 a night. Of course, we could always splurge for the famed Canyon Ranch, but that will set us back thousands.

By the way, the east coast isn’t immune from these kinds of prices. Why? According to The New York Times, it’s about supply and demand. Jeez… I thought we were experiencing a recession. Apparently not:

As if the sagging dollar and soaring oil costs weren’t enough to dent travel budgets, hotel room rates are expected to surge in the coming year. From New York to Asia, and just about every desirable destination in between, the prices of rooms — especially at hotels and resorts favored by luxury and business travelers — are expected to rise significantly, sometimes in the double digits, analysts say.

A shortage of rooms is to blame. “Supply is simply not keeping up with demand,” said Jan D. Freitag, vice president for global development at Smith Travel Research in Nashville. “So hotels can — and do — command premiums for any rooms they can sell.”

And they’re selling out indeed. But who is buying? Are you? We’re not. Seriously, who can spend this kind of money? And with the summer travel season just around the corner, what are you doing for your vacation this year? I’m interested in hearing your comments over at Queercents.

Looking for some alternatives? Click here to learn more about these three ideas:

1. Be a tourist at home.
2. Still need to get the hell out of Dodge? Ever heard of house swapping?
3. Think camping!

Yeah, well I won’t be doing any camping this summer… but knock yourself out all you camping lesbians.

In Search of Gay Money: Odd couple: When financial opposites attract

As gays and lesbians writing about money, we’ve grown weary of reading all the personal finance content that’s written from the perspective of straight marriages. So at Queercents, we’ve turned the tables on money and relationship advice by asking: What if all of our favorite money columnists were gay? Would their advice be more relevant to our lives?

We think the answer is yes! And as such, this is our weekly series called In Search of Gay Money where we reprint their advice by swapping out pronouns and a few other words to make it seem like everyone is queer!

Click over to Queercents to read the Odd Couple: When Financial Opposites Attract by Yuval Rosenberg and Queercents.

How much money should parents leave behind? Do rich kids deserve a windfall?

“It is not only fine feathers that make fine birds.” – Aesop

Back in January, there was a captivating profile in Fortune Magazine about Melinda Gates, power philanthropist and wife of Bill. The article noted their plan to give away 95% of their wealth in their lifetimes and when asked how much they will leave their children, Melinda indicated they will follow Warren Buffett’s philosophy: “A very rich person should leave his kids enough to do anything, but not enough to do nothing.”

Fortune has written about this at least once before. Back in 1986 to be precise. I’m surprised they even had this one online instead of in the library basement where articles of old can only be found on microfiche. But here it is in living link color.

Buffett does not believe that it is wise to bequeath great wealth and plans to give most of his money to his charitable foundation. Having put his two sons and a daughter through college, the Omaha investor contents himself with giving them several thousand dollars each at Christmas. Beyond that, says daughter Susan, 33, “If I write my dad a check for $20, he cashes it.”

Buffett is not cutting his children out of his fortune because they are wastrels or wantons or refuse to go into the family business -- the traditional reasons rich parents withhold money. Says he: “My kids are going to carve out their own place in this world, and they know I’m for them whatever they want to do.” But he believes that setting up his heirs with “a lifetime supply of food stamps just because they came out of the right womb” can be “harmful” for them and is “an antisocial act.” So what’s the right amount to leave them?

He went on to say that for a college graduate, Buffett reckons '”a few hundred thousand dollars” sounds about right.

Others use what’s called an incentive trust. This blogger at the Wall Street Journal explains:

Inheritances that have strings attached are known as incentive trusts. They might stipulate that a kid can’t have access to his $10 million until he graduates from college or gets a job. Or they might say that the heir gets cut off if he or she is caught with drugs or abuses alcohol. Some are values-based, saying that an heir has to live up to the broader values of the patriarch in order to get the money.

But should money become a shaper of character? He continues:

To my mind, however, incentive trusts are something of an oxymoron: You leave your kid a fortune, but attach conditions designed to mitigate the impacts of that fortune. It’s a bit like giving someone a lifetime supply of Haggen Dazs, but saying that they can only eat it if they agree to diet and lose weight. And if the conditions are values-based, then the parents are using money to impose their views and principles on their kids — another effective way of robbing them of their own identity.

So here’s my advice: If you really want to mitigate the effects of large fortunes on your kids, don’t leave them a large fortune. Let them find their own careers and success, rather than using money to dictate from the grave.

Character aside, Dayana Yochim at The Motley Fool argues that a dollar spends the same unless it’s inherited and gives these tips to ready yourself for a windfall:

1. Do not put your life on hold, waiting for the windfall.
2. Chill out, but don’t freeze in your tracks.
3. Treat it like you would any other money.
4. Don’t invest like your parents.
5. Carefully consider your options.

So what do you think? Are you relying on an inheritance as part of your financial plan? Do you expect a windfall from your mom and dad? Do you receive trust payments now and if so, what stipulations are attached to them? Would you choose to pass on great wealth to your kids? What is the difference between money gained and money earned? We’d love to hear your thoughts over at Queercents.

Ten Money Questions for Monica Nation

Monica Nation is the co-owner and general manager of Kate’s Lazy Meadow Motel in Mount Tremper, New York (that’s in the Catskills Mountains, not too far from famous Woodstock).

The Kate part happens to be Kate Pierson of the B-52’s. They’re partners in life and partners in business. While Kate is away on tour and promoting the new album, Funplex, Monica offered to get hospitable with us about money, their “love shack” and how they divvy up the cash receipts.

Mosey on over to Queercents to read more or catch other interviews in the Ten Money Questions archive.

How much money do you make? “I make enough,” she said.

I’ve asked this question before: how often do you hear a talk-show host ask a movie star how much money they made on their last film? Rarely. Why? Because money is still considered a taboo topic and it doesn’t play well on the circuit of celebrity chatter.

“Salary stories are intrusive. Do you ask your neighbor what they earn for their job?” That was a quote by Nicole Kidman. Even Howard Stern, who will talk about almost anything, has said before, “I don’t talk about my salary.”

But on Sunday, I learned that Gen Y is all about revealing what they make. The New York Times reported that personal finance is not so personal anymore. In this Facebook era, nothing is too private to be shared amongst friends and co-workers:

For people old enough to remember phone booths, a blunt reference to salary in a social setting still represents the height of bad manners. But for many young professionals, the don’t-ask-don’t-tell etiquette of previous generations seems like a relic.

For them, salary information is now fair game, at least among friends. Many consider it crucial to prosper in an increasingly transient, winner-take-all workplace — regardless of the envy that full disclosure can raise. Besides, when the Internet already offers a cornucopia of personal information, it almost seems coy to keep personal income private.

Or does it? Anita Bruzzese, the author of 45 Things You Do To Drive Your Boss Crazy…and How to Avoid Them, appears to be about my age and the topic seems to make her cringe: In a live radio interview last year about my book, the host asked me:

“So, Anita, how much do you make writing your syndicated workplace column?”

Thankfully, you couldn’t see my reaction, because I have a feeling my face sort of resembled a landed halibut. But after a moment’s hesitation, I answered him in a round, ballpark-figure-sort-of-way.

But Penelope Trunk of Brazen Careerist fame believes there isn’t anything wrong with asking co-workers how much money they make. In fact, she encourages it: “Don’t be shy because everyone else is asking too.”

Or are they? One Frugal Girl (who is thirty) had something to say about this topic. She writes:

The topic of income is usually taboo, but I bet almost everyone has been asked about their salary at least once in their lives. In college my friends and I talked openly and honestly about money. We discussed increasing book costs, rent, and utilities. I even remember celebrating the 15 cent raise of one of my roommates. No one objected to talking about money when we were working in low-paying, part-time jobs, but it seemed no one wanted to discuss salaries when we started our ‘real jobs.’ When graduation dates neared a few of my friends discussed their starting salaries, but most kept their new incomes to themselves.

In my twenties I still remember discussing income with my friends. But at some point in my early thirties it stopped. On both sides: Friends stopped offering this information, I stopped asking and vice versa. I recall a close friend once mentioned that she was interviewing for a job promotion and the package was over $300,000. We never talked about income after that. I felt like I couldn’t keep up (so I didn’t really want to talk about it) and perhaps, it just seemed in poor taste to be disclosing these details… even with a close friend.

But our sister, Suze Orman, god love her… made a great point during an appearance on “The View” last year by asking her co-hosts and other guests to reveal their salary on the air. Nobody took her up on the challenge. But Suze thinks people should share salary figures as a way of fighting income disparity and level the playing field.

It seems younger workers seem to have less of problem with all this transparency. Fogies tend to be more discreet. After all, I was never one to kiss and tell… unless it offered up good money fodder. So back to you… If someone asks how much you make, do you tell them? If you comment, do so over at Queercents. Please tell us your age or at least what generation you belong to: Gen Y, Gen X or a Baby Boomer.