Women, Emotions and Cash
“Most women are one man away from welfare.” – Gloria Steinem
On the plane ride back, I chatted with the woman next to me who happened to attend the same conference in Barcelona. The flight had a delayed departure and we were both trying to make connections in Frankfurt. She was flying the last leg on United, which allowed her to make it home to her husband and three-year-old. I was supposed to be on the final American flight heading west that day and unfortunately, as I was racing between terminals, the jet bridge had already kissed the aircraft goodbye.
Needless to say, the delay gave me an extra 24 hours to read, write and plan for posts that might entice readers to return after being gone for more than a week. So I’ll start with my new friend above… I took the opportunity to quiz her on the challenges of being a working mother. This is top of mind since we are in the height of the insemination process… although I promised Jeanine that I wouldn’t blog about our baby making in real time… I’m certainly allowed to bend the ear of the career gal sitting next to me.
Anyway, it was interesting to hear her opinions about taking time off from work after having the baby. She stayed home a year and then said it was the “Mommy & Me” class routine that sent her back to work. Her words: “It was fine being home alone with the baby; it was another thing to have to hang out with the moms… I can pay someone to do that.” She claimed their voices fluttered in such high octaves that she couldn’t understand a word they were saying in this chirping range.
I’m not making a judgment call about the woman in 15F and her views on the mommy set, but I did find it interesting that money wasn’t even cited as a reason for returning to work. She seemed to just want to get back to the familiar world of like-minded people. This brings me to the topic of Liz Perle’s latest book, Money, A Memoir: Women, Emotions, and Cash, and how it offers “an unflinching look at how irrational a rational woman can be when it comes to money.”
Now, I haven’t actually read this book, but I caught the review in a recent issue of Time magazine and then found a more detailed version online with Publishers Weekly in which Perle recounts a story about her grandmother “who schooled her on life’s important lessons, the main one being the importance of looking out for yourself. The old woman handed young Perle a tiny woven metal sack, called a knipple in Yiddish. Inside was a $20 bill. “It’s a woman’s private stash,” she explained to Perle. “Every woman needs money of her own that her husband never knows about. So she can do what she wants. Remember that.”
Prudential Financial did a study about the financial experience and behaviors among women and found that American women have clear priorities relating to their financial goals. Yet their outlook for achieving these goals is shrouded in uncertainty. Why do women lack empowerment when it comes to money? This was the main reason that I picked finances as a blog topic from the very beginning. The Sitting Pretty name and “Straight Financial Advice” subtitle was really just a tongue-in-cheek way of pointing out to women what Perle says best… “I had drunk the cultural Kool-Aid that told me that having a husband meant social and fiscal security and that I wouldn’t have to deal with my own financial well-being.”
“Embarrassed and occasionally unnerved by my own tendency toward erratic fiscal behavior, I’ve stubbornly refused to exam it, instead choosing to pin my hopes on that white knight, dream job, unknown dead rich uncle, or winning lottery number,” she writes.
Hmm… it’s just another way of singing, “You’re Gonna Make it After All”. And sing we do!
On the plane ride back, I chatted with the woman next to me who happened to attend the same conference in Barcelona. The flight had a delayed departure and we were both trying to make connections in Frankfurt. She was flying the last leg on United, which allowed her to make it home to her husband and three-year-old. I was supposed to be on the final American flight heading west that day and unfortunately, as I was racing between terminals, the jet bridge had already kissed the aircraft goodbye.
Needless to say, the delay gave me an extra 24 hours to read, write and plan for posts that might entice readers to return after being gone for more than a week. So I’ll start with my new friend above… I took the opportunity to quiz her on the challenges of being a working mother. This is top of mind since we are in the height of the insemination process… although I promised Jeanine that I wouldn’t blog about our baby making in real time… I’m certainly allowed to bend the ear of the career gal sitting next to me.
Anyway, it was interesting to hear her opinions about taking time off from work after having the baby. She stayed home a year and then said it was the “Mommy & Me” class routine that sent her back to work. Her words: “It was fine being home alone with the baby; it was another thing to have to hang out with the moms… I can pay someone to do that.” She claimed their voices fluttered in such high octaves that she couldn’t understand a word they were saying in this chirping range.
I’m not making a judgment call about the woman in 15F and her views on the mommy set, but I did find it interesting that money wasn’t even cited as a reason for returning to work. She seemed to just want to get back to the familiar world of like-minded people. This brings me to the topic of Liz Perle’s latest book, Money, A Memoir: Women, Emotions, and Cash, and how it offers “an unflinching look at how irrational a rational woman can be when it comes to money.”
Now, I haven’t actually read this book, but I caught the review in a recent issue of Time magazine and then found a more detailed version online with Publishers Weekly in which Perle recounts a story about her grandmother “who schooled her on life’s important lessons, the main one being the importance of looking out for yourself. The old woman handed young Perle a tiny woven metal sack, called a knipple in Yiddish. Inside was a $20 bill. “It’s a woman’s private stash,” she explained to Perle. “Every woman needs money of her own that her husband never knows about. So she can do what she wants. Remember that.”
Prudential Financial did a study about the financial experience and behaviors among women and found that American women have clear priorities relating to their financial goals. Yet their outlook for achieving these goals is shrouded in uncertainty. Why do women lack empowerment when it comes to money? This was the main reason that I picked finances as a blog topic from the very beginning. The Sitting Pretty name and “Straight Financial Advice” subtitle was really just a tongue-in-cheek way of pointing out to women what Perle says best… “I had drunk the cultural Kool-Aid that told me that having a husband meant social and fiscal security and that I wouldn’t have to deal with my own financial well-being.”
“Embarrassed and occasionally unnerved by my own tendency toward erratic fiscal behavior, I’ve stubbornly refused to exam it, instead choosing to pin my hopes on that white knight, dream job, unknown dead rich uncle, or winning lottery number,” she writes.
Hmm… it’s just another way of singing, “You’re Gonna Make it After All”. And sing we do!
posted by Nina Smith at 6:18 AM
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